

The Northliner
October 13, 2023
Dear Member and Friends of UCN
This week, I am hearing from many of you are being greatly disheartened (and discouraged) by the horrible/inhumane violence in Israel/Gaza. I came across this article about Hope Fatigue this morning’s Washington Post -- by writer Tara Parker-Pope -- which I believe contains some very timely and practical suggestions to spiritually and emotionally help us through this difficult moment in history. This Sunday we will focus more on these important issues, do be with us if your schedule permits.
Rev. Scott
Hope Fatigue
Psychologist Lesley Alderman outlines eight steps to help ease your anxiety when world events — or even personal ones — are out of your control.
How to cope when there’s so much bad news
Earlier this week, I woke up feeling rested and well, with my dog quietly snoozing beside me. I felt ready to start my day. And then, I remembered. The headlines and devastating videos from the war between Israel and Gaza surfaced in my mind. The earthquake in Afghanistan. The war in Ukraine. My momentary lightness disappeared, and the anxiety of it all returned to my gut, welled up in my chest and forced my eyes shut again. I hugged my dog, wishing for a better world.
Psychologist Lesley Alderman says her patients have consistently told her they have grown weary of bad news. They have wanted to feel like life would return to normal after years of pandemic living, only to conclude that “normal” isn’t what it used to be.
Alderman has noticed that her patients are experiencing a “deficit of optimism,” feeling overwhelmed and anxious about important issues far beyond their control. She called it “hope fatigue,” and the symptoms include feeling anxious, a need to tune out or feeling like giving up.
Alderman notes that dwelling on issues that seem unfixable can lead to an “anxious paralysis,” but she says there is hope. She outlines eight steps to help ease your anxiety when world events — or even personal ones — are out of your control.
1) Take a break from the news. “I advise patients who are feeling depressed by the headlines to read the news just once a day, turn off alerts on their phone and, if possible, check social media sparingly.”
2) Take care of yourself. “I tell my patients: You have to be in good fighting shape to cope with the current turbulence.” That means boosting your resilience by sleeping, eating and exercising well and engaging in life-affirming activities.
3) Focus on the present. Get in the habit of anchoring yourself in the here and now. Fretting about the future is not helpful.
4) Try a breathing exercise. Take a few deep breaths. Inhale to the count of five and exhale to the count of five. It will help calm your sympathetic nervous system (the fight-or-flight response) and lower your anxiety.
5) Think about your victories. Remind yourself of what’s working well in your life — whether it’s your job, friendships or something else.
6) Be your own therapist. Ask yourself, “What do I specifically feel hopeless about and why?” Being able to put into words what’s getting you down can help you feel less flooded by emotions and better able to process the information rationally.
7) Take action. Worrying doesn’t help one’s mental health, but taking action does.
8) Join forces with a friend. Pick a cause. There are hundreds of nonprofits dedicated to addressing some of the most tenacious challenges on the planet. Donate money or volunteer.
These steps won’t ease the suffering of others or solve a geopolitical crisis or end a war. But they will help you manage your anxiety, be more present for yourself and others and, hopefully, take action to make your community better.
“Look around your community,” Alderman writes. “Maybe your local playground would benefit from a basketball court, or your church or synagogue could sponsor a refugee family. When people engage in local issues, they have a renewed sense of optimism.”
The Washington Post, October 12, 2023
Read more about hope fatigue (Google the phrase, there is more material out there on the internet) and what you can do about it.
Sunday Services
Sunday services are held at 10:00 am. Currently our services are held live at UCN and also streamed on Zoom. Coffee hour follows the service.
Join Zoom Meeting:
https://zoom.us/j/93364454692?pwd=U29yanFGZTUvOXAvcWM0UWQ1UFU0QT09
Meeting ID: 933 6445 4692
Password: 13800
The service begins promptly at 10 am. If you'd like to join in conversation before the service, you may join the Zoom meeting at 9:50 and wrap up your conversations shortly before 10.
October 15: “Human Nature,” Rev. Scott W. Alexander
All of us (as caring Unitarian Universalists) have been terribly shaken and discouraged by the heart-breaking violence and cruelty being perpetrated right now in both Israel and Gaza. To help us think through our moral and spiritual responses to all this, I want to address the complicated theological issue of "human nature" at our regular Sunday service this coming Sunday, October 15th, at UCN. It is my plan to have those who are interested to remain in the sanctuary (for perhaps 15 or 20 minutes of discussion) at the conclusion of the service at 11 AM to share our thinking (and our hopes and fears) with one another. Do be with us if you can for this important Sunday.
Oct. 22: “Living with Hearing Loss: A Couple’s Journey,” Waring and Gretchen Fincke
I (Waring) will start with my hearing loss journey, the technology I’ve used to combat it and the lifestyle changes I had to make to accommodate it. Gretchen and I will then share how we learned to communicate all over again as my hearing loss progressed.
I am a retired criminal defense lawyer, former corporate guardian for the elderly and disabled, political and social justice activist and op-ed columnist for Conley Medial Gretchen is a licensed clinical social worker and certified sex therapist who ran her own mental health clinic and developed the only local program for transgender people going through their transition. She currently trains students seeking certification as sex therapist supervisors. We live in the Village of Kewaskum in Washington County.
Connections
We send our sympathy and caring support to the Zumachs. Julie's dad, Les Hotchkiss, experienced several months of congestive heart failure and passed away last Sunday afternoon. Todd and Julie were able to be at his side. A funeral is scheduled in Wausau on Monday, October 16: https://www.petersonkraemer.com/obituary/LesterLes-Hotchkiss
From the Minister's Desk
Click the link below to read Rev. Scott's sermon, "Empathy," which is Sermon II in the Year-Long Series “12 Gates to the City: How to Enter the Holy City of Your Own Life,” from Oct 8, 2023. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1UAJvmZXpiS3ui2Ez9akuzuB8bGjgoJhB/edit?usp=drive_link&ouid=109072791973067277249&rtpof=true&sd=true
* RE News
Our children and youth Religious Education classes will start next week on Sunday, October 15, and meet until June 2024. The classes run on the first and third Sundays of the month during the last half of the church service.
Additional teachers are needed at all age levels. We are especially looking for teachers for the high school class.
If you are interested in volunteering, please contact our committee chair, Betsy Muellenbach, betsy.muellenbach@gmail.com.
October 29: TRUNK or TREAT for ALL AGES!!!
UCN’s 3rd annual TRUNK or TREAT is a spooktacular way to celebrate the turning of October to November! Decorate your car trunk or hatchback and bring some treats, or wear your costumes, or both – this event is for grown-ups and children, teens and tweens, UCN members and friends, and also [reasonably] well-behaved pets.
In addition to costume and vehicle decorating prizes, there will be games, and luscious lunch goodies like hot dogs and mac n’ cheese.
Set up will begin at 11:00 am, following the UCN service. Trick or Treating will begin at 11:30 am.
- “Trunk” participants, please confirm by Oct 22nd and also let us know if you will need electricity for your trunk display.
- “Trunk or Treat” participants, please give us an approximate count by Oct 22nd so that we can plan food accordingly.
If inclement weather is an issue, festivities will be moved into the Fellowship Hall.
Katie Egan-Bruhy
Green Team Family Hiking and Events
Enjoy the Fall Colors. Join Us for Some Family Hiking!
* Please text or call Julie Cabaniss 414.617.5157 by the Friday before each hike to verify that you are coming. If Julie doesn't hear from people, she will assume no one is coming and cancel the hike.
Saturday, Oct. 14, from 9-11 am, Horicon Marsh hike and Archaeology Festival! Meet at 9 am at the Horicon Marsh Visitor Center at 9 am for a hike and then if interested, stay to explore the state's best Archaeological Festival at the visitor center that runs from 10 am-4 pm. For more information and address, please check this link: https://horiconmarsh.org/event/14391/2023-10-14/
Saturday, Nov. 18th - TBDecided!
First Sunday Lunch is Starting Up Again!
Hi, Folks,
First Sunday Lunches will begin on Sunday, Nov. 5th.
You’ll have many great lunches where you can enjoy some great food with your UCN friends. We’ll be serving soups & salad, chili, mac & cheese, potato bar, taco bar, hot & delicious, as well as finger foods at the All Soul’s Café in January.
You’ll be invited twice to bring food to contribute to these great lunches, so be looking for an email from someone in our great committee. We have so many great cooks!
Linda Sandersen
* Social and Racial Justice
Important MICAH Public Meeting (UCN is a member of MICAH)
Please join interested parties from congregations, churches, synagogues and mosques as the Milwaukee Inner-city Congregations Allied for Hope (MICAH) shares the following:
- Celebrating MICAH'S issue-wins!
- Listening to powerful church choirs!
- Lifting up our presence in the community!
- Welcoming new member congregations!
- and Introducing the We All Belong Campaign!!
When: Thursday, October 26th at 6:00 pm.
Where: Wauwatosa Ave. United Methodist Church, 1600 Underwood Avenue, Wauwatosa
Ask a church friend or a neighbor friend to attend and carpool with you. Parking lot is available.
Submitted by Lucy Friedrichs and Leigh Hoftiezer, UCN co-reps to MICAH and We All Belong
Save The Date
The NAACP Ozaukee Executive team is proud to announce the date of the 33rd Annual Freedom Fund. We hope that you will join us to celebrate a night in the theme of "Thrive Together" at the River Club of Mequon on November 10, 2023.
Further details on ticket purchase will be shared soon! For now, please mark your calendars and plan on a night of enriching conversation, entertainment, and celebration.
Please reach out by email to naacpoz@naacpozaukee.org if you would like to purchase a table for the event.
* Announcements
Have an Inquiring Mind?
Sure you do. If you would like to know more about Unitarian Universalism and our church, plan to attend the New to UU and UCN Classes on Sunday, October 22 and Sunday, November 5. Both classes will be held in the Clara Barton Room downstairs down from the Fellowship Hall and both are from 11:30 to 12:30. Child care will be provided if needed. Feel free to bring any questions you may have; answers are free. For more information, contact Dan Lusk at 262-234-9406 or dlusk09@gmail.com.
Lost and Found
Look for your lost and found items in the lower level hallway this weekend. Soon everything will be donated.
Good Grief Group
Losing someone you love is life changing, and grief can be difficult. Sometimes it’s helpful to share with others who have also experienced a deep loss – the sadness, the challenges, the next steps and the joys that may follow. You’re not alone.
The next group meeting is scheduled for October 11 and will gather every other Wednesday from 9:30-11:00 am in Emerson (the large room off the north lobby, upper level). Judy DeLillo, a new member of the Lay Pastoral Care Team, will help facilitate conversation and support in this new group at UCN. Please contact Judy at 720-935-0851 with any questions.
Morning Meditations
Tuesday Morning Group Meditations continue at 9:30 am in the Sanctuary. No experience necessary. Tap into the wisdom of the ancients as well as current-day teachers. Learn about the mind and breath’s connections as we sit quietly and share our inner experiences. Donations welcome for UCN.
Anna Rychner, facilitator and meditation teacher of the Himalayan tradition.
Events at UCN
- The next WSSS concert will be held on Oct. 28. Go to wsss.org for details.
- A Kirtan will be held Oct. 14 at 7:00 pm. Details at kaitakirtan.com.
- Qi Gong is held most Saturdays at 11 am in the Fellowship Hall. Call Diane at
307-763-0903 for details. First class is free for UCN members. - Al-Anon meetings, offering recovery for families and friends of alcoholics and drug addicts, are held every Tuesday morning at 8:30 a.m. in the Clara Barton room and online.
Thank you for supporting the groups that use our facilities.
Community Events
"5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche," Saturday, Oct 14, 7 p.m., at United UU Congregation, 506 N. Washington Ave., Waukesha, WI
United UU proudly presents "5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche," brought to you by Mosaic Players, a traveling theatre troupe whose work embraces social justice, human rights, and equality.
'5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche' is a scintillating satire of women's roles in the 1950s, enlisting its characters in a caricature of the sexism, heterosexism, consumerism, and Communism exuberant in the era. Join us for this absurdly adorable and unapologetic declaration of lesbi-independence!
This is a very interactive show. Feel free to dress like we have stepped back - wear your favorite 1950s attire! The performance will be followed by a Q&A with the cast and one of the playwrights, Mr. Andrew Hobgood!
Click to buy tickets here.
* Calendar
Calendar through October 22
Meetings are held via Zoom, unless stated.
- Saturday, Oct. 14, 9:00 am: Hike at Horicon (Julie Cabaniss)
- Monday, Oct. 16, noon: Ladies' Lunch - Mequon Fiddleheads (Brenda Berg)
- Monday, Oct. 16, 7:45 pm: Comm Tech Committee (Sarah Cesar)
- Tuesday, Oct. 17, 9:30 am: Meditation (Anna Rychner)
- Tuesday, Oct. 17, 7:00 pm: Finance (Pete Blain)
- Sunday, Oct. 22, 11:30 am: New to UU Class (Dan Lusk)
- Tuesday, Oct. 24, 9:30 am: Meditation (Anna Rychner)
- Wed. Oct. 25, 9:30 am: Good Grief Group - Emerson (Judy DeLillo)
- Sunday, Oct. 29, 11:30 am: Trunk or Treat (LaToya Bates)
The monthly calendar for UCN events, not including rentals, can be seen on our website at: https://ucnorth.org/calendar/
Please remember to contact Lyn, info@ucnorth.org, to reserve rooms for your meetings, rehearsals, ceremonies, etc. To hold an event or ceremony at UCN, contact Lyn for date availability, facilities use forms, and answers to your questions.
All church committee meetings are open; visitors are welcome. Contact the committee chair (listed on the calendar above) for details or to receive the zoom info for a meeting. For information on classes and groups that meet at UCN, as well as future meeting and event dates, please see the website, www.ucnorth.org, or call the office, 262-375-3890.
* Reminders
Service and UUA Information
Service Assistants are needed for Sunday Services. Please contact Julie Konik (julie.konik@gmail.com) if you can help.
The Sunday Services Zoom Team is looking "for a few good zoom hosts." Please contact Gerry or Dan if interested.
Sunday Announcements: If you would like to have an announcement read at the service, please prepare it using the Spoken Announcement Guidelines, and send it to Joy Schroeder (peacenow@charter.net) or Julie Konik (julie.konik@gmail.com) or that Sunday's Service Assistant by the FRIDAY BEFORE the service, and they will relay it to the worship assistant.
- Reserving the Projector: If you will need the projector for a given date, please remember to sign the “Projector Reservation Signup List” on the clipboard on the table outside the office in the north lobby.
- UU Women's Connection offers retreats, newsletters and resources for women: https://www.uuwomensconnection.org/
- The Common Read for 2023-24 is On Repentance and Repair, by Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg. Go to UUA.org/read for more information.
- You are encouraged to subscribe to MidAmerica Region's newsletter, News page. More information at uua.org/midamerica .
- Watch videos from General Assembly at uua.org/GA
General Information
Becoming a Member of UCN is very easy. Simply make a pledge of record, sign our Membership Book, and provide contact information for our records. We also provide New to UU and UCN Classes in the Spring and Fall. It is not necessary to attend the classes, however they are very informative, providing information about Unitarian Universalism and our church (its history and how it operates). For more information, you can contact Dan Lusk (262-234-9406).
- Caring Circle: a group of people who may be willing to bring meals, help with transportation, make visits, pick up groceries, etc. for members and friends of UCN in temporary need. Sign up at church or virtually: https://www.signupgenius.com/go/10C0A44ACA82BA75-caring
First Aid Kits are located near the elevators on each level. Each kit is in a white box and mounted on the wall. AED Machines are near the first aid kits. If you have any questions, please contact Brian Bunzel, Building Committee Chair, at (262) 573-0045 or brianbuzel@yahoo.com.
UCN is now able to accept donations via PayPal. Please use the QR code above, or see our website (Donate) for more details, or or click here: give.ucnorth.org/paypal/
Food Barrel: Don’t forget to grab a food item out of your pantry for the food barrel as you leave for church.
Scrip Fundraiser: Scrip Cards are still a great way to support UCN. Use cards for carryout or online purchase with ScripNow!. There are 3 ways to buy or reload your cards: ScripNow! (Pay online, use online or in person), PrestoPay (buy or reload cards) or at UCN. If you have a special request or questions about Scrip, contact Mark Muellenbach.
If you order from Quill.com and tell them UCN recommended them, UCN will earn a $50 gift card.
Support Black-Owned businesses: "MKE Black" offers a list of Black-owned businesses you can reference: https://mkeblack.org/
If you would like to donate directly to Family Promise, the only shelter for homeless people in Ozaukee County, please send your donation to them, with “UCN Member” written in the memo line. This will give UCN credit for the donation. Their address is: Family Promise of Ozaukee County, 136 W. Grand Ave., Port Washington, WI 53074.
The Social Justice Committee has an OPT-IN email list for anyone who would like to be notified on short notice to provide a physical presence at social justice activities. Please contact Sherryl Andrus, sherryla70@gmail.com, to be added to the list.
Monthly Fellowship Gatherings
UUsOutToLunch meets on the first Wednesday of every month at noon, and sometimes at suppertime during daylight savings time. Couples, singles, men & women are all welcome, long-term commitment or not. Each month, a different member of the group takes the responsibility of choosing a restaurant at which to meet and eat, and emails the rest of the group with the particulars as to what and where, requesting yay or nay from the emailed recipient, so that reservations can be made if required. Join us! Email brendaberg@spectrum.net
First Sunday Lunch: Join us after the service in the Fellowship Hall for lunch and fellowship on the first Sunday of the month, November through June.
* Submitting Content for our Publications
Please submit articles for the Northliner to info@ucnorth.org. To keep the Northliner from becoming cumbersome to read, you are encouraged to keep these articles short, and to run them only twice. The deadline for submitting articles is every Thursday at noon. Items submitted later might not be proofed for errors or published.
Please contact Adam Schodron (webmaster1@ucnorth.org) to submit articles for our website.
* Contact Information and Links
Minister, Rev. Scott Alexander: office phone: 262-375-4748; cell phone: 772-359-0602. Email: UURevScott@gmail.com . Rev. Scott will generally be in the pulpit the first three Sundays of the month and in his office the first two weeks of every month.
Director of Religious Education, LaToya Bates: 262-385-3408; dre@ucnorth.com
UCN Office Hours: Tuesday through Friday, 9 am to 2:30 pm. Contact Lyn at 262-375-3890 or info@ucnorth.org. The office is closed for holidays and bad weather. Please do not reply to the Northliner; we do not receive messages sent to lyngust@mailgun.smore.com, but if you are having trouble receiving the Northliner, please add that address to your contact list.
Links
Information on our Share the Plate Recipient
Minutes from current Leadership Board meetings
- Our pulpit schedule contains a wide range of topics that cover spiritual exploration, various theologies, holidays, social justice, and more. Read descriptions of the upcoming sermons and bios of the speakers.
For more information about UCN, see our website www.ucnorth.org or call the office at
262-375-3890.
Please check channel 4, 6, 12 or 58, or our website, www.ucnorth.org, for weather closings.
Unitarian Church North
Email: info@ucnorth.org
Website: www.ucnorth.org
Location: 13800 N. Port Washington Road, Mequon, WI, 53097 USA
Phone: 262-375-3890
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/UnitarianChurchNorth/