Dear 7th grade parents & guardians,
You've made it. You've endured the middle of the middle school years and in my opinion, the most pronounced time of mental, emotional, and physical change. I know this is redundant, but this group of students really is remarkable. They are involved, athletic, musical, theatrical, smart, and more often than not, kind and compassionate. This year, I've watched them reach out and warmly welcome new students from the U.S. and from other countries, express genuine concern over peers' emotional well-being, and support classmates going through injuries or medical challenges. So although they may still leave their socks all over the house, take way too much time obsessing over their nails, or devolve into uncontrollable laughter when certain bodily sounds occur, I promise you they are indeed becoming more thoughtful and mature young adults.
For some reason, the concept of COMMUNITY has been on my mind lately. A lot of researchers have been delving into this topic over the last ten years. As we become more technologically "connected" why are reported levels of loneliness sky-rocketing? What physical symptoms and ailments can be traced back to loneliness? What affect have I-Phones, online worlds, and social media had on loneliness and associated problems such as anxiety and depression? (*Spoiler alert - it isn't looking too good...) What, if anything, can we do to draw our kids out of loneliness and online isolation and into community? With school ending, your child is stepping away from a significant COMMUNITY for the next ten weeks. School isn't always great, but most days it's pretty darn good. There is structure. There are expectations. There is intellectual stimulation. There is communication. There are supportive adults who engage with you and ask about your day. There are friends and story telling and laughter. So as your child looses this community for a while, what can you do to help them experience that sense of community within other types of communities this summer?
Home & Family:
Think about the structure of your child's family life this summer. What are the daily rules and expectations? How do you want your child to communicate with you and other members of the family? When will you check in with your child? When will people share about their day and experiences? How will your child contribute to the family community a.k.a. What chores are they expected to do and how often?
Neighborhood:
This community is often overlooked but I cannot stress it enough. Your child is at a phase where they are less inclined to be influenced by you and more inclined to be influenced by the approval of others. How can you take advantage of this fact and help them engage within their neighborhood? Can they offer to take care of pets or plants when neighbors are on vacation? Can they mow the grass, wash a car, bring in trash cans, or deliver home baked cookies to an elderly neighbor? Can they serve as a parent-helper or sitter for families in the neighborhood. So.Many.Opportunites.
Arlington Heights:
We are truly fortunate to live in a community with so many wonderful organizations. Are there places your child can volunteer 1-2 hours a week? Animal shelters, the library, food pantries, FMSC, churches/synagogues/temples. Most teens think of these spaces as ones for adults and are surprised and empowered when they realize they can truly contribute and make a difference in these community settings.
Social:
Last but not least, please encourage your child to stay connected to their friends over the summer. For some teens this is 100% natural and you don't have to push them to make plans or get out of the house. For others, socializing is more challenging and nerve-wracking. They may fall into a summer of isolation spending lots of time in their room gaming or doom scrolling TikTok. No two adolescents are the same so some may want plans with friends 7 days a week, while others only want plans once a week. You can respect where your child is at socially and developmentally while still encouraging growth in that social domain.
Best wishes for a relaxing, adventurous, and community filled summer. See you all back in 8th grade!
