Habit 5: Seek first to understand

Stellaluna by Janell Cannon

The True Story of the Three Little Pigs by Jon Scieszka

The Runaway Bunny by Margaret Wise Brown

Are You My Mother? by P. D. Eastman

Is Your Mama a Llama? by Deborah Guarino

Rules by Cynthia Lord (chapter book)

1. Body language can be even more important than words. Play a game of charades where you have to guess each other's emotion without using any words, just body language.

2. Demonstrate how saying the same phrase in a different tone of voice can give the phrase a completely different meaning.

3. Ask your student what their biggest listening problem is. Do they "pretend listen?" Do they only give advice or judge? Do they plan what they are going to say instead of really listening?

4. Is there an issue that you and your student always argue about? If so, go to them and say, "Help me understand your point of view." Then really listen without interruptions. When they are finished, repeat in your own words what you heard until she or he acknowledges feeling understood. Then reverse rolls.

5. Ask your students to let you know when they feel that you aren't listening. When it happens, thank them, listen, and share back and forth until they feel understood.