EHP FYI
Newsletter from Employee Health Promotions
March Edition 2024
Alone but Not Lonely: How to Build Connections and Feel Less Lonely
When I was 20 years old, I was in the car with my friend who I had known since I was two. I don’t remember how it came up, but I ended up telling him about my social anxiety. It was the first time I really opened up about it to this friend — or any friends. I had always tried to present myself as confident, even when I wasn’t. And while I probably wasn’t fooling anyone in the confidence department, hiding my social anxiety often made me feel alone and disconnected from the people around me. As I opened up to my friend, to my surprise he shared that he, too, was struggling with social anxiety. Although we had been friends for almost 18 years, it was in that moment that I felt a real, meaningful connection to him.
In all relationships — whether with family, friends, or romantic partners — to have true meaningful connections, we need to be open, vulnerable, and authentic. Without true connections, we’re at risk for feeling lonely. Loneliness stems from dissatisfaction with our relationships with family, friends, or our greater community, even when they’re physically close to us. We can feel lonely even when we’re not alone. But, we’re not stuck. There are steps we can take to feel less lonely.
Recognize the cycle of loneliness.
The first step is to acknowledge our feelings of loneliness. Admitting we feel lonely isn’t easy, but as the saying goes, “What you resist, persists.” The more we deny feeling lonely or we ignore it, the worse that feeling becomes. We risk falling into a cycle of loneliness. Statements like, “Maybe I don’t have friends because there’s something wrong with me,” denies that the feeling of loneliness may be due to a lack of connection. This type of thinking can lead to further isolation and can prevent us from seeking out more connections.
Practice authenticity and vulnerability.
If we want to make genuine, strong connections, we have to be willing to show our full selves, faults and all. Inauthenticity inhibits us from living a satisfying life and makes it near impossible to form true connections. As we let ourselves be more vulnerable, we can start to strengthen old relationships and create new ones with people who make us feel comfortable. It takes constant, ongoing effort and courage to be vulnerable. It’s scary. But it’s worth it.
Put time on the calendar.
Schedule times to meet or chat with people, and follow up. Host a game night, watch a show over video chat, organize a crafting session, cook over Zoom, do a paint and sip night. Find fun activities that work with your group and make them happen!
Find your people.
Look for online or in-person groups to join, such as sports teams, local charities, religious organizations, book clubs, or advocacy groups. As adults, it becomes much more difficult to meet people as when we were kids. We need to put ourselves out there if we want to make these connections.
Engage with your coworkers outside of work.
Ginger (now Headspace) was my first remote job, and it’s also probably the place where I’ve felt closest to my coworkers. Seek out coworkers with similar interests or circumstances. Engage in internal chat channels. You may be surprised to discover the connections you can build while working.
Practice compassion, serve others, and accept help.
Being friendly, generous, and considerate not only makes us feel good about ourselves, it helps others trust us, which can play a huge role in relationship building. Acts of kindness can be simple, like celebrating a coworker’s achievement, writing a letter to a friend, paying for someone else’s coffee, or bringing food to a neighbor. When we serve others, we form a bond with the person we help. We also reaffirm to ourselves that we have value to give to the world. Remember, too, to accept help when it’s offered. Though we may not want to seem like a bother by accepting help, when we refuse it, we deny someone else the joy of giving — an experience that can bring two people closer.
Prioritize self-care and good mental health hygiene.
What kind of mental health article would this be without a mention of self-care? But in all seriousness, self-care can help us overcome feelings of loneliness. This acronym is a reminder of good self-care: Brain M.E.D.S., or meditation, exercise, diet, and sleep. Meditation, regular exercise, a healthy diet, and the right amount of sleep are fundamental to good mental health hygiene. Practicing gratitude is a form of self-care, too. Being grateful for what we have can help us see the world from a different perspective and stop our negative cycles of thinking.
Building connections takes effort and courage, and while it may sound like a lot of work, it can also be fun. It was a huge relief to open up to my friend during that car ride together. Having social anxiety made it especially hard to talk about… social anxiety, but once I did, my friend and I were able to laugh together about our common experience. You never know what another person is going through. Being vulnerable yourself opens the door for someone else, and may even lead to a surprising new relationship.
-written by Neil Sundberg for HEADSPACE
Health Resources for You
Everything needs a tune up now and then. Employee Health Promotions, made possible through a partnership with South Central Service Coop, has changed. This work, which focuses on the health and wellness of all Mankato Area Public Schools employees, looks very different this school year. Here are ways for you to take action:
Know This: Your Site Representative
Add This To Your Calendar: March 10K-A-Day, May Shake It Up.
Visit This: Employee Benefits page for details on resources available to you
Bring your Staff ID and Attend: Water Aerobics and Lap Swim at East Pool
March 10K-A-Day 2024
This year we are trekking through the South Central part of Alaska! Linked here is the participation sheet to record your steps and/or exercise minutes each day. You can find your site/building in a tab along the bottom of the sheet. Record steps or exercise minutes for 12 days out of the month to help earn funds for your building to use for wellness activities. Watch your emails each week this month for fun facts about our stops in Alaska and the winner of a goodie bag!
Staff Highlight: EHP Site Representatives
EHP is managed by a leadership team. In addition, each site has an EHP Representative. These are the volunteer wellness leaders for your building. They are the ones who share EHP information, organize wellness events or classes, and facilitate your participation in district-coordinated events and rewards. They are wellness champions for Mankato Area Public Schools and for that we are very thankful!
Monthly Recipe
Roasted Root Vegetables - University of MN Extension Service
- 4 medium root vegetables (potatoes, rutabagas, turnips, parsnips, sweet potatoes, etc.)
- 2 medium carrots, diced
- 1 medium onion, chopped
- 2 tablespoons vegetable oil
- 1 teaspoon garlic powder
- Salt and pepper to taste
Directions
- Preheat oven to 425 degrees F.
- Peel and cut vegetables into similarly sized bite-sized pieces.
- Place vegetables in a medium bowl and pour oil over top.
- Add garlic powder and mix well.
- Season with salt and pepper to taste.
- Spread mixture into a baking sheet or shallow baking pan.
- Stir and check vegetables every 10-15 minutes. Vegetables are done when they show signs of crispness and browning and are easily pierced with a fork. Roasting time will average 30-60 minutes, depending on the type of vegetables and size of pieces.
Tips and variations
- Do not crowd the vegetables or use too deep of a baking pan. Doing so will steam vs. roast the vegetables.
- Experiment with a variety of vegetables (cauliflower, broccoli, beets, etc.), herbs, and spices (basil, rosemary, thyme, etc.).