GRIEF
The theme of this newsletter will focus on grief. Over the past several months our Department has been reeling from grief over the loss of our brothers and sisters that have been injured and have passed.
Grieving is a very personal experience, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve a loss. Your grieving process will be shaped by factors like your personality, coping strategies, life experiences, beliefs, and the significance of the loss to you. Healing from grief takes time and happens slowly, it can't be rushed or forced, and there is not a set timeline for it. While some people might start feeling better in a few weeks or months, others may need years to work through their grief. It’s important to be patient with yourself and allow the process to progress naturally.
Each of the five stages of grief, which include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance, involves a period of time where a person adjusts to the idea of the loss they have experienced.
The grief comes from the reality of their impending death. However, the model has been widely used by those also suffering a sense of loss from the death of a loved one, such as a spouse, sibling, child, or friend.
It is important to note that the five stages of grief do not occur in a specific order. Just because they are numbered below does not mean that’s how a person experiences them during grieving. In fact, the stages can come in any order and even return before one of the other stages even occur.
1. DENIAL AND ISOLATION
Let’s start with the first stage, which very often comes first but that may also continue throughout the process of grieving. There is shock, fear, and confusion all rolled into one or more reaction to the news of the loss.
It’s this denial that can often move us into another common reaction to grief at this stage, which is to isolate ourselves. By doing so, we might be able to avoid reality. However, it’s during this isolation where we might also wonder what the point is to life if we just die and those around us die.
2. ANGER
Once a person can see that death is a reality, denial disappears. In its place, anger often appears. This intense reaction to the loss comes from our frustration that we cannot control what happens in life. Anger can appear as everything from resentment and bitterness to rage. There is also anxiety that expresses itself as anger.
3. BARGAINING
In this stage, a person may think about what they could have done differently to prevent the loss in an attempt to regain control.
4. DEPRESSION
Across the waves of anger and rationalization comes a deep sadness that is difficult to shake. That long-lasting sadness is known as depression. There are a few types of depression that originate from grief. The first one is a reaction to the loss, which exhibits itself as paralyzing sadness, regret, and worry. The second type of depression is what we go through when dealing with the loss head-on and looking for a way to move forward.
5. ACCEPTANCE
Reaching the acceptance stage of grieving does not happen to everyone who grieves. If the death was sudden and unexpected or the denial and anger never pass, acceptance will not come.
It is important to note, though, that acceptance for those who experience it does not appear as happiness. An individual is also not accepting that the loss is okay.
-The 5 Stages of Grief and Coping Strategies by Gloria Horsely
This is what grief is.
A hole ripped through the very fabric of your being.
The hole eventually heals along the jagged edges that remain. It may even shrink in size.
But that hole will always be there.
A piece of you always missing.
For where there is deep grief, there was great love.
Don’t be ashamed of your grief.
Don’t judge it.
Don’t suppress it.
Don’t rush it.
Rather, acknowledge it.
Lean into it.
Listen to it.
Feel it.
Sit with it.
Sit with the pain. And remember the love.
This is where the healing will begin.
Check in on your people. You may be dealing, well or not so well, but others are definitely struggling.
The Dallas Police Department is happy to announce a partnership with XR Health for the use of VR Goggle Therapy.
We have two "Quiet Room" locations at headquarters as an introduction to VR therapies and decompression.
XR Health also has multiple levels that are available to employees that include:
- Mental Health
- Physical Therapy
- Occupational Therapy
Sign up with XR Health and provide Texas Blue Cross Blue Shield information.
Copay price will vary depending on your healthcare plan.
- Intake and Assessment
- Unlimited use of XR Health applications
- Tracking and Progress of Modality Goals
Please contact a member of the Dallas PD Wellness Team at DPDWELLNESS@DALLASPOLICE.GOV if you are interested.
Peer Support Opportunity
If you are interested in becoming a Peer Support Member, or know someone that would be interested in joining, please contact our Peer Support Coordinator, Sasha Kim at sasha.kim@dallaspolice.gov.
There is no greater reward than being there to help a peer, watch them grow and know that you were a source of assistance in their time of need.
Contact Sasha or click image for nominations.
MILITARY LIAISON
FINAL THOUGHTS
"When life breaks you, it is because you are ready to be put back together differently.
Every piece of you that feels shattered is a piece that will find a new place, a new purpose, a new meaning.
Trust that the cracks are where the light gets in. And sometimes, in our brokenness, we find our greatest wholeness.
We find the courage to rebuild, to reimagine, to redefine what it means to be strong.
You are not broken; you are breaking Through."